You know you are from Ohio if...
Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.
You measure distance in minutes.
Down south to you means Kentucky.
You know several people who have hit a deer.
Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.
You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
Stores don't have bags. They have sacks.
You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it
no matter what time of year it is.
You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example:
"Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with."
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable,
Your idea of a really great tenderloin is when the meat is twice as big
as the bun and accompanied only by ketchup and a dill pickle.
You say catty-wumpus and kitty-corner.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O
salad with Marshmallows.
When asked how your trip was to any foreign, exotic place, you say, "It
You consider being called a "Pork Queen" an honor.
You carry jumper cables in your car.
You don't need to be told what to bring to a potluck dinner.
Green Jello passes for a vegetable dish.
You drink "pop."
You know what "cow tipping" is.
You only own 3 spices, salt, pepper, and ketchup.
You design your kids' Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
You have more miles on your snowblower than on your car.
Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
You think everyone from bigger cities has an accent.
You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.
You owe more money on your snowblower than you do your car.
Your snowblower gets stuck on your roof.
The local paper covers national and international headlines on 1/4 page, but
requires 6 pages for sports.
You think that deer season is a national holiday.
You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
You find -20 degrees below zero "a little chilly".
You know all the 4 seasons: Winter, Still Winter, Almost Winter, and Construction.
You know what a real buckeye is, and have a recipe for candy ones.
You know if another Ohioian is from southern, middle or northern Ohio as soon
as they open their mouth.
You can spell words like Cuyahoga and Tuscarawas and Ashtabula and Conneaut.
You know that Serpent Mounds were not made by snakes.
You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your Ohio friends.
And you all laugh at them together!
| DID YOU KNOW??
...Robert Cavelier Sieur De La Salle was
probably the first European to explore the
territory of Ohio?
...Ohio ranks first in Swiss cheese production, second in egg production, third in ice cream production, fifth in soybean production, sixth in corn production, ninth in trout, milk, and winter wheat production, eleventh in apple production, and thirteenth in lamb and sheep production?